- Go at your pace – the 6 week all-clear is a bit of a joke. We are hardly emotionally, physically or mentally ready that soon after birth. It is your body, your recovery, and there is no right or wrong time to start being intimate again. You will know when you are ready. Honour yourself and take your time.
- Cultivate sensuality – this is all about making you feel connected with your body and your pleasure. Start with non s3xual pursuits like wearing an outfit that makes you feel beautiful or ordering a dish and savouring its flavours. S3x should be a pleasurable act. Focus on what gives you pleasure outside of the bedroom and bring that energy into the bedroom (or wherever you like to do it!)
- Be romanced – consider getting a babysitter for an evening so you and your partner can spend quality time together, without the responsibility of parenting. Get out of ‘mother’ mode, and just be. Be a woman on a date, unapologetically lavishing up attention from the person opposite you. We want you feeling like the sultry goddess that you are.
- Peristeam before s3x – yes, I keep banging on about steaming! 😉 The Kama Sutra wasn’t wrong when it touted peristeaming as a pre-s3x routine to help get in the mood. Peristeaming helps with lubrication, releasing tension and calming the nervous system. It is also great for connecting to your genitalia without touch, and gently bringing awareness and warmth to it. It is like foreplay to the foreplay, of which there should be plenty!
- Use your voice – communicate how you are feeling to your partner. Voice your concerns so they are not second guessing. But equally voice your pleasure when the situation presents itself. Your voice and your vagina are intimately connected. Use it your advantage.
If you feel pain during s3x, it’s a good idea to have it assessed by a pelvic floor physio like Shea @femalefirstphysio or a scar tissue expert such as Jo @thriveformothers.
Pleasurable s3x is one of life’s most wonderful gifts, I hope you find your way there again.