Having a baby is one of the biggest life changing events a woman can go through, but it’s not always so rosy. One in three Australian women experience birth trauma and one in ten have PTSD after giving birth; and this number is on the rise.
I often hear women say they pee a little every time they laugh or sneeze, because they’ve pushed out three babies or because they are postmenopausal; and accept this as the norm. NO! This is NOT normal. Common YES, normal NO.
This post isn’t just about incontinence per se, but I wanted to highlight how often women accept certain conditions as a byproduct of childbirth or age. To the point that 70% of women experiencing some form of incontinence don’t even seek out any professional help.
It’s time we change the narrative on what we accept as normal when it comes to our bodies.
This post isn’t just about incontinence per se, but I wanted to highlight how often women accept certain conditions as a byproduct of childbirth or age. To the point that 70% of women experiencing some form of incontinence don’t even seek out any professional help.
I think it’s time we change the narrative on what we accept as normal when it comes to our bodies.
This is where Peristeam Hydrotherapy comes in; and it is one of the tools to help bridge this gap. Peri refers to the perineum, steam is self explanatory. Hydrotherapy because we are using water as a therapeutic intervention. This practice is more commonly known as yoni, vaginal or pelvic steaming.
I wasn’t always a Peristeam Facilitator, but I chose this profession because I couldn’t deny how effective it was. I was also compelled to share this knowledge so that no woman goes through what I went through. I’d like to share my story and how I got into this line of work.
My intention is not to scare nor intimidate, but rather to empower; and to remind ourselves that we are much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.
In 2018, my husband and I were expecting our first child. She was born vaginally and I sustained a second degree perineal tear. Being a first time mother is hard enough as it is. Navigating sleepless nights, the hormonal fluctuations, breastfeeding challenges, sore nipples; anyone who has had a baby knows the deal. But nothing prepared us for what was to come.
At my 6-week checkup, my GP found stitches in my rectum which was causing an infection. My GP then referred me to a gynaecologist, and after several appointments with this gyno, it was decided that I was to have corrective surgery done so that she could redo the stitches.
I had this corrective surgery done the day after my daughter turned three months old. At first, it seemed like the surgery was successful, but after eight weeks things took a turn.
I started feeling a swelling in my perineum, and pain that oscillated between sharp and excruciating to dull and continuous. I found it hard to walk or sit or do anything comfortably. To top this off, I had pus draining out of my vagina. I went back to the gynaecologist, and she told me to take painkillers and get on with it. The surgery was successful, she said.
So I went back to my trusted GP, and she confirms that I definitely have an infection and refers me to a specialist gynaecologist this time.
By now, I had been on antibiotics on and off for about five months, and the prescription had to change. The new antibiotics were not breastfeeding friendly, so I had to give up nursing my child earlier than what I had hoped for.
All this news came to me just a few days before my first ever mother’s day. I was so in love with my beautiful daughter, but also I felt like my body had betrayed me.
In June 2019, I went to see the specialist gynaecologist.
During that meeting he asked me something that I will never forget. He asked me whether I pooped out of my vagina. I said no, but then went on to ask him if other women experience this. His answer was yes, that it happens when a woman has a fistula, an abnormal connection between two body parts that should not be connected. In this case, the rectum and the vagina.
Now I’m the first to admit that I’m extremely grateful that I wasn’t pooping out of my vagina, but that doesn’t discount what I was going through.
He thought I had a rectovaginal fistula but the symptoms didn’t match up. And because I didn’t have any level of incontinence or any other issues, my symptoms weren't considered to be too bad. The specialist gyno said to continue taking antibiotics and wait it out. I was to see him in another 3 months.
By now, my mental health was NOT in a good place. Besides the oscillating pain, the impact this had on my mobility, and the pus draining out of my vagina, I also had a 7 month old baby to look after.
My husband and I did not have an intimate relationship anymore. My sense of self worth and self confidence had long gone. A part of my body that I had always associated with pleasure and awe turned into disgust and contempt.
It was unnerving to know that no doctor had given me a proper diagnosis or treatment plan, or any indication as to how long this hell would go on for. I started thinking that maybe this is it. Antibiotics and pain management for life.
I had always wanted two children but that didn’t seem to be an option for me anymore. My husband felt helpless as he watched me crumble, so I reached out to a psychotherapist for support.
My psychotherapist referred me to a S.T.R.E.A.M practitioner, who specialises in scar tissue remediation for scars from birth injuries, both c-section or perineal scars.
The S.T.R.E.A.M practitioner thought that perhaps it was the scar tissue that was causing the infection. It's common for scar tissues to cause a lot of problems. And I had three injuries in my perineum, so it was a logical hypothesis.
By now, it was time to see the specialist gyno again as three months had passed. There was no change in my condition so he referred me to a colorectal surgeon. The specialist gyno thought that the issue was not a gynaecological one.
I met with the colorectal surgeon in October 2019. He said I first needed to do a colonoscopy, to find if there were any perforations in my colon causing the infection. My colon was intact thankfully, but the cause of the infection remained unknown.
He told me that I had 12 - 18 more months of recovery left, with multiple surgeries along the way. My daughter was nearly a year old when I was told this, which meant I wouldn’t be healed till she was about 2.5 years old, so around April 2021.
This may sound shocking and unacceptable to some, but to me this was music to my ears. Finally, a medical doctor gave me a timeframe and some sort of treatment plan moving forward, that did not involve just antibiotics and waiting it out.
A few weeks later, I came across a Doctor of Traditional Chinese Medicine, who had her own traumatic postpartum journey. It took her 18 months to heal from giving birth to her first child, and she totally healed herself, on her own. I was intrigued and booked an appointment with her.
She's the one who taught me how to do pelvic steaming at home. Now I knew of the practice from a cultural perspective, but the way they do it in India is not easy to replicate in our modern day homes.
I’ll never forget my first pelvic steaming session. I prepared the space, and sat over this pot of warm water, infused with the herbs given to me.
Within a minute or so of sitting on this, I felt my perineal muscles relax and all tension release. For the first time in twelve months, I felt no pain down there. A sense of euphoria and calmness washed over me. I loved how it made me connect to a part of myself that I'd learnt to disassociate myself from. I started steaming every night followed by scar tissue remediation therapy.
A few weeks later I was at my colorectal surgeon's office for my routine checkup. He examined me and asked if I had started doing something different. I told him I started vaginal steaming; he looked at me confused so I explained the process and he said to continue doing it, that it’s working! He observed accelerated healing and encouraged me to keep doing what I was doing!
I was so elated to get this feedback. Not only was I loving the practice, but to have my experience validated by a medical professional was so encouraging.
A couple of months pass and I have been religiously steaming and doing the scar tissue work. My symptoms were better, the amount of swelling subsided and the pain was negligible, but the infection didn’t go away. The colorectal surgeon advised to start the surgical procedures as soon as possible.
So on 7 Feb 2020, I went in for my first surgery with him. We both thought that it was one of many surgeries. After the surgery he told me that he had done nothing but make an incision in my perineum and left the wound open to heal from the inside out. He said that I had healed so much internally that there was nothing else left for him to do.
I saw him a few weeks later for my post "op" checkup, and he said that this was it. He took down notes of how to do pelvic steaming and that's the last time I ever saw of him.
The 12 - 18 months of recovery time that he had predicted turned out to be less than 5 months. I was done! I was healed! Thank goodness for pelvic steaming, because in March 2020, covid hit our shores and all elective surgeries were put on hold.
I'm so grateful for this practice that changed my life, but I wonder how long it would have taken me to heal if I had started steaming straight after birth, just like we are supposed to.
I consider myself to be extremely lucky to have come across this practice when I did, and am on a mission to help other women access it as well.
I completed my certification in 2022 whilst pregnant with my son, yes my dream of having two children came true!
He is nearly a year old now and I keep on reaping the benefits of the practice to this very day. My periods are painless and come like clockwork, and sex is more pleasurable. I lust after my husband as I near ovulation; and withdraw myself from the world as I approach my bleed week..NORMAL!
My cycles are so regular and asymptomatic that it does not cause any disruption to my life. I am in harmony, and that’s the power of pelvic steaming.
I offer free 30 minute chats (discovery calls) to anyone who is curious and would like to see if pelvic steam is right for them. If you have any questions, or would like to share your own birth or pelvic steaming story, please comment below. I’d love to hear from you.
Steamy blessings, Sanjukta xo
